Todays thought...Men and women of God.

I've had a lot going on in my life as of late. And it hasn't all been good at all. People telling lies, for what reason I can only surmise is to hurt me, as there is no other explanation I can come up with. Doing it to hurt my family and for what, I don't know. I just can't understand it. And it's put me in a rough place. I don't want to meet anyone new, I don't want to talk to but a very few select people, it's changed me. As much as I hate it, as much as I despise it, as much as I detest that part of myself, it's changed me; I just don't know if it's a permanent change, or if like I've been told in the past, I will get back to the open part of myself.

So in my moments of silence, I tend to reach out to men and women of faith. Why? Because my faith embodies most everything of what I am. And when I struggle with it, I reach out to those who I know would have an answer. In one particular conversation I'm having with one of these people of faith, I was reminded when they told me, they're not perfect either. That they're human too, and they err, and they are broken, just like I am. I can't even begin to explain what that one statement meant to me. I have a big problem with putting people up on a pedestal. Especially someone I consider to be a man or woman of faith. And I guess, with some people that are in higher planes of religion (i.e. preachers, pastors, reverends, etc...), as a leader of a church, you tend to put them up a bit higher, whether you realize you do it or not.

And I can't even imagine the immense amounts of just...PRESSURE...that these people must feel. I KNOW I'm not the only one that see's them as...perfect beings?...even though knowing that the only perfect one was Jesus. And honestly, most of them, KNOW that others see them as perfect beings, and relish the thought. Then there are some, that will tell you flat out; Don't put me on a pedestal. I'm just as broken as the next person, and if you put me up there, all you're going to get is disappointment.

It's actually, incredibly refreshing to talk to someone who doesn't put themselves on a level above anyone in this world, least of all...me. I'm not perfect by any stretch. I struggle every day with issues that I shouldn't even be dealing with, because they're mostly brought on by myself. But the fact that there are men and women of faith, that know they're not perfect, don't claim to be and will tell you flat out that they're not, bluntly, tells me that there is hope for someone like me. A person of faith, that KNOWS she's not perfect...